This is why I don't watch much TV.

One of the perks (if you could call it that) of being home with nothing to do is the opportunity to catch up on my television watching. Unfortunately, this includes ads like the one I saw for Baby Safe Haven. This is an adoption agency in Connecticut, the mission statement of which was neatly summed up in a 30-second rap by about twelve teenagers of various genders and races. In the middle of the group was a girl cradling a blanket wrapped around...I don't know, maybe a small pillow. Together they chanted:
"If you have a baby and don't know what to do/Baby Safe Haven can help you choose!"
Well, yeah, but not in the way they'd prefer. Someone should let them know that rap can barely sell sneakers, let alone places to abandon your offspring. At the very least, they could change it to something that actually rhymed.
"Got a kid? Don't know where to stick it?/Baby Safe Haven is just your ticket!"
Or maybe something like:
"Baby Safe Haven: Never mind the way we treat 'em/At these prices, just be glad we don't eat 'em!"
I figure the logical next step, if this hasn't happened already, is the use of rap to sell erectile dysfunction drugs. And if you can't come up with a couplet or two in response to that, you don't deserve to be reading this blog.