You're what for a what?!

I'd like to start a movement to popularize the phrase "begging for a pegging" in reference to excessively homophobic people. Like "Did you hear the virulently anti-gay-marriage address George Bush gave today? Laura better get her strap-on ready--that man is begging for a pegging!"
Of course that's assuming everyone knows what "pegging" is. Look it up on the internet if you're unsure; you'll find some very informative and educational websites.
In other news, it looks like V-Day this year will be my D-Day. No, not because I'll be single for the fourth straight Valentine's Day in a row (none of my relationship timespans since then have included February 14th...convenient). Rather, it's the due date for study abroad applications, a sonata that I have to compose for music theory, and my first music lab test. Maybe it's a good thing I'll be single. You know, I won't be bothered by distractions, like roses, or heart-shaped chocolate, or hot candle-lit Valentine sex...
Ah, fuck it. I couldn't stand Valentine's Day even on the one occasion that I had somebody. I'll make it a good day anyway: a day to congratulate myself for meeting my deadlines, put on some soothing music, and pretend that both my next-door neighbors aren't getting lucky.